14 Feb 2007

You Don’t Show Your Sites to Matt.

On my way home from work last night I was listening to Jim Croce’s "You Don’t mess around with Jim" and I started playing with the words, so this morning I spent a few minutes writing my rewording of this song.

Now I know Matt’s over in London at SES right now, so here’s a bit of advice for everyone there.

You Don’t Show Your Sites to Matt.

The blackhats got DaveN
The Whitehats they got Doug
And the Google Search Engine has Mr Matt Cutts
He’s a spam fightin’ son of a gun.
Yea he’s the public affairs saviour
a conference panelist and a blogger
And when Page and Brin get together at the plex
you know they all call Matt GoogleGuy, they confess.

And they say you don’t buy that link for juice
You don’t wear a hat that’s black
You don’t buy links without the ‘ole no follow
And you don’t show your sites to Matt

Well out to a SEO conference comes a newbie boy
He said he’s looking for man named Matt
He says he’s a PR buying boy, his name is Johnny McCoy
But at his company they call him Pagerank Zak
Yea he’s looking for this person known a GoogleGuy
He drinks sprite and touts a goatee that’s black
and last week he took all my rankings, and it may sound funny
But I’ve come to get my rankings back
And everybody say Zak, ohh, don’t you know

That you shouldn’t buy that link for juice
You don’t wear a hat that’s black
You don’t buy links without the ‘ole no follow
And you don’t show your sites to Matt

Well a hush fell over the conference room
When Johnny raised his hand and stood up on his seat
And when Matt’s analyzing was done
There wasn’t a site of Johnny’s that wasn’t banned
And Johnny knew he’d be tossed onto the street, woah.
Yea he was banned in several places
And he was supplimental’d in a couple more
And you better believe it turned into a horror story
When Pagerank Zak sunk to the floor, aw

Now they say you shouldn’t buy that link for juice
You don’t wear a hat that’s black
You don’t buy links without the ‘ole no follow
And you don’t show your sites to Matt

———-

oh, and stay tuned for the new Link Ninja Song coming out soon!